Soul-Searching.

So, I graduate college in about 7 months with an associate's degree in Liberal Arts. Sounds great right? Yeahhh, but where do I go next? What do I want to do? How do I want to go about getting what I want? How do I go about finding what I want out of life? Are you getting the point I'm making? Lol. I don't know what I want. I just know whatever I do I want to enjoy every second of it. I'm seriously not bothered with the money aspect of it. I mean money is nice, but I just want to be happy. Did y'all know I'm a writer? Hah. No? Well I am, and even though my writing is one of my strong qualities, it's so difficult for me. I'd love to write for a living. I'd love to do something off-beat, something I don't feel oppressed by. So here is what is and has been weighing on my mind. I want so many things!! I just don't know where I want to go next. AHHHHHH!!! Help!!
Other news...me & Ryan are doing very very well, as usual. My dgos are as stubborn & spoiled as EVER! But, I love them!!! lol. I wish I could know what the hell they were thinking. We are headed down to Florida tomorrow. My sis is moving to Tennessee, she needs time to go do whatever..enrolll kids in school & daycare, get a place to live, all that adult stuff. So, we're going to take care of her kids for the week! Yay! I miss them something horrible. My plan is to take this time to explore the world of photography. FL is a much more eye-pleasing place than Ohio, don't we all agree? If I like it...I might be a photographer..who knows?!
I'll update about my trip to FL && what excitement that brings when I get back. I'm so glad to be getting away for a while. Getting away from everything!! Ah, I believe it's much needed, to clear my head. Write to you soon! Thanks for all the support!!

((Here is my latest, a profile of myself. Small profile..hope you enjoy it...))

Soul Searching
The lights are dimming and the crowd settling; they're all waiting for the performance. As show time begins to creep closer, the anxiety this girl is feeling intensifies. She thinks of herself as a girl because she doesn't yet know what she wants out of life, or what she has to offer. Others in her life would beg to differ, thinking she is a puzzle beautifully pieced together. She is her own worst critic, and knows this firmly. She is still trying to find her way. She lives for today and only today, so she thinks, even though her future is on her mind constantly.

Her world on the outside seems seamless, but if you look beneath there is uneven stitches and popped buttons. All these problems can be fixed, even though at times she feels like they can't be because there isn't enough time! The big run-way show is about to start! She'll be graduating college in about seven months. Excited is what people think she is, but petrified is what she feels. She has no clue where or what she wants to do next. She has a million ideas, but nothing concrete. She doesn't want to live a boring life, so she thinks more about how she would like to work instead of what she would like to do for work. A free-lance type career is what she is shooting for, just for the unpredictability of it. That could be anything! A writer, photographer, graphic-designer, but is this something she really wants to do for the rest of her life? Just because she doesn't want a hum-drum-nine-to-five life?

Writing and photography are a few of her passions and hobbies. Turning them into a career seems like it would be a slice of bliss, but scares her to death that she'd end up hating the few things she loves to do. It is well known that money is the root of all evil. Maybe that root would turn her blissful career into a nightmare? She often remembers a quote from the great Marilyn Monroe who she truly marvels, "I don't want to make money, I just want to be wonderful." Happiness is truly what she wants, but money is just as desirable, no matter what people say. Mostly, then the contemplation of what she is good at and what she can make a go-ahead at, boils down to is this- is she good enough? As mentioned before, she is very aware that she is her own worst critic, but this is a dog-eat-dog world. She just wants to know if she'll be the one feasting, or the feast. The uncertainty pains her already too critical mind.

She could survive in this bullish world, whether being the bruiser or the beaten. She has a good sense of who she is, even if she doesn't know what she wants. Her morals and values are there as if engraved in stone for all to read. They will remain whether she becomes a writer or a veterinarian. Her parents and boyfriend show her the utmost support in everything she does. Her parents have said the cliché "you can do anything you want to do!" But, the difference is that they actually believe it! Her boyfriend, while being frustrated with her fickle ways, reassures her every step, "I know you'll be wonderful at whatever you do, I'm just still waiting for you to pick something." This is part of the reason she would make it in this cruel world. Her family and friends to keep her back straight and chin up. They'd be there to spit her own words right back at her, "kiss my ass," just so she wouldn't forget to tell those who need to hear just that.

This girl has the world in her white-knuckled- grip, and refuses to let is slip away. Her name is Mary Daugherty. Watch out, you'll know her one day, for something. For now she has a lot of small stitches, and buttons to fix in the fabric of her life. Her big fashion show starts in seven months. Even through her own hesitation, the show must go on! She'll end it with a bang, and leave you speechless.

((if you liked..GREAT!! most of my stuff is posted on my space, www.myspace.com/goofymaryelizabeth--check it out!!))